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Quote Author Rating  
"How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being." Oscar Wilde 4.8611 average rating  
"Bigamy is having one husband or wife too many. Monogamy is the same." Oscar Wilde 4.2143 average rating  
"Never get married in college; it's hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you've already made one mistake." Elbert Hubbard 3.5714 average rating  
"Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join." Elbert Hubbard 3.2500 average rating  
"Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does." Groucho Marx 3.5000 average rating  
"Marriage, n. A community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all two." Ambrose Bierce 3.5000 average rating  
"I tended to place my wife under a pedestal." Woody Allen 5.0000 average rating  
"Though marriage makes man and wife one flesh, it leaves 'em still two fools." William Congreve 5.0000 average rating  
"Courtship to marriage is as a very witty prologue to a very dull play." William Congreve 5.0000 average rating  
"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago." Will Rogers 5.0000 average rating  
"A single man has not nearly the value he would have in a state of union. He is an incomplete animal. He resembles the odd half of a pair of scissors." Benjamin Franklin 2.5000 average rating  
"The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution." Bertrand Russell 5.0000 average rating  
"Newlyweds become oldyweds, and oldyweds are the reasons that families work." Author Unknown 4.0000 average rating  
"Divorce: The past tense of marriage." Author Unknown 5.0000 average rating  
"English Law prohibits a man from marrying his mother-in-law. This is our idea of useless legislation." Author Unknown 4.0000 average rating  
"Three rings of marriage are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering." Author Unknown 4.6667 average rating  
"Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity." Author Unknown 5.0000 average rating  
"Mistress: something between a mister and a mattress." Author Unknown 4.5000 average rating  
"Mother-in-law: a woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers." Author Unknown 5.0000 average rating  
"Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie." Author Unknown 5.0000 average rating  
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Browse Marriage quotes by Author:
Ambrose Bierce Author Unknown Benjamin Disraeli
Benjamin Franklin Bertrand Russell Bill Cosby
Charles Caleb Colton Christopher Morley Dorothy Parker
Elbert Hubbard George Bernard Shaw George Eliot
Gloria Steinem Groucho Marx Henny Youngman
Mae West Oscar Wilde Robert Frost
W. Somerset Maugham Will Rogers William Congreve
Woody Allen Zsa Zsa Gabor  


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